Today B & I are both working half days & then skedaddling to the airport where we fly back to my parents house in the ski country of Utah. I’m looking forward to a white Christmas, listening to my brother read Baby Z ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas and generally enjoying some family time. Other things I’m sure will happen:

• I will ask my Dad to make me a cappuccino. He will tell me to make it myself. I will tell him I don’t know how to use his fancy machine. He will remind me he’s shown me 100 times. I will remind him that I can’t remember, it is too complicated, and besides, anything with a risk of explosion should be left to him. He’ll tell me to take myself to Starbucks. I’ll whine that he lives in the middle of nowhere and Starbucks is 30+ minutes away. At the end of the argument my cappuccino will magically appear. Win!
• I will organize my Mother’s fridge. She will say thank you but remind me that it is a little rude to organize someone else’s fridge because it implies that it isn’t tidy enough. I will say “TOUCHE MOM” and continue organizing. We will stick our tongues out at each other.
• My Dad will take B & I skiing/snowshoeing/crazy-new sport he just invented that involves snow, ice and an element of danger-ing and tell us we are going the “easy” way. We will believe him. It will not be easy. I will ask B to ask the Coast Guard to come rescue chopper my lifeless body off a mountain peak at 7,000 feet. B will collapse next to me in the snow, telling me what we really need is the ski patrol. At some point during this near death experience my father will run by, loop us 8 times while throwing snow in our faces and will generally mock us. He will drink two lattes at a hut that he built himself in the mountainside while B and I crawl back to the car, nearing the point of exhaustion and dehydration. (If you know my father you know just how true this story is.)
• I will drink my parents out of wine and beer. TOO BAD PARENTS, TOO BAD.
• I will generally delight in everything Baby Z unless it involves a dirty diaper. In that instance I shall use the ” I’m only his godmother/auntie” card and leave him to his parents. WIN!
• I shall take advantage of my Mother’s gourmet kitchen while using all of her paper towels. She will complain about my abundant paper towel usage while I complain about her measly two rolls that are expected to get me through a major holiday. DO YOU NOT HAVE A COSTCO MOTHER?

Happy Holidays!